09/08/10 — United Way Kickoff

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United Way Kickoff

By Dennis Hill
Published in News on September 8, 2010 2:24 PM

Holy Community Campaign! Where are the heroes when you need them?

The United Way will kick off its annual campaign Thursday evening at the Paramount Theatre with an appearance by the ultimate super villain and only the help of the residents of Wayne County can stop him.

The evil "Dr. Doom," a.k.a., local amateur actor Geoff Hulse, is expected to make an appearance at the event, hoping to convince United Way supporters that their efforts to help the organization reach this year's $1.4 million goal will be futile.

Confronting him will be "The Uniter," a.k.a. Lynn Williams, the chairman of the campaign, who will assume the identify of a superhero dependent on the support of the community for her powers. Her job is to stop the doctor from derailing the campaign. How well she succeeds will depend on the response she gets from residents who ignore Dr. Doom and instead, decide to reach out to their neighbors in need.

That won't sit well with the doctor.

"That Uniter is so annoying," he says. "Why does she and the rest of the United Way crowd think that adults need to know how to read? Who cares if teens get a second chance? Why, the more miserable people are, the happier I am! That's what keeps the world interesting. Homeless families can live in the streets. Kids hate homework. Why should the Boys and Girls Club help them get it done? Teen pregnancy, obesity, bring it on! All that I need is a little help from you, the citizens of Wayne County."

And just like in every tale involving a superhero, there to chronicle it all will be the trusty newspaper reporter -- complete with screaming headlines and an edition fresh off the presses.

The show, which begins at 5:30 p.m., will also feature several citizens who have decided to step up and fight Dr. Doom.

Will they succeed? Or will Dr. Doom prevail.

Stay tuned.