Remembering Judge Finan
By Ethan Smith
Published in News on July 3, 2015 1:46 PM
The robes Judge Tim Finan wore did not define him.
The gavel he wielded didn't earn him the respect he commanded.
Those who knew him best say it was the man he was and the life he lived that made him the kind of person whose loss leaves a void that will not be filled.
And today, as they try to deal with Finan's untimely death, they remember a man who loved his family, brought joy to others, had a knack for making people laugh, and who lived a life of compassion, faith and humility.
Finan, 62, a Wayne County District Court judge, died early Tuesday of a sudden heart attack. Days later, friends are still trying to grasp the reality of his passing.
Bob Walker, a close friend of Finan's since 1974 when the two were budding young lawyers, saw Finan that morning at the YMCA.
"I was leaving my workout and I saw him and John Walston, his best friend, in the workout area there, walking on the treadmill," Walker said. "I popped my head in and we talked and joked around for a little bit, and then I left to go home."
Walker said he had not been home for long when he received word of the judge's passing.
"I was devastated, you know," Walker said. "My daughter and his son, Patrick, were best friends their entire lives. I couldn't believe it. It's a huge loss for anyone that knew him."
Gracyn Parker experienced firsthand the kindness for which Finan was known.
After losing his own father at 13, Parker looked to Judge Finan as a role model and surrogate father.
That made the loss even harder to bear -- or to fathom.
"He was someone you could always count on to be there, and suddenly, he just isn't there anymore," Parker said.
He said after getting the news, all he could do was hang up the phone and be silent.
"I sat there for a good 15 or 20 minutes in just complete silence," Parker said. "I called the person back to make sure it was real, that they actually said he had died. Then I called my friends and I just had to talk about it, you know?"
Parker -- and all of Finan's closest friends -- describe him as a man with an infectious belly-laugh, riotous sense of humor, an intrinsically good heart and as a man who commanded a room.
"He owned the room the moment he walked in it," Parker said. "He was so well-respected. Anytime you talked to him, he would immediately have a smile on your face because you knew a joke was coming at some point in the conversation. By the time you finished laughing at one joke, he would already have you laughing again at something else he said. I still haven't found a better role model than him. He is truly one of the best people I have ever met, and it is a tragic week for everyone."
Linda Gwatney, whose children were friends with Finan's children for most of their lives, said quick wit met its match on the day it met Tim Finan.
"I knew him for 25 years," Mrs. Gwatney said. "Our children grew up together and went to Wayne Country Day School together. The first thing I said when I got the news was, 'The world has lost a wonderful man.'"
Mrs. Gwatney -- as well as many of Finan's closest friends -- said she would miss his laughter the most.
"He lived life how we should all live it," she said. "When my husband called me and told me that he had died, it was like it wasn't real. I still don't believe it and we're all still in shock."
Finan began his law career during four years of active duty in the United States Air Force as a prosecutor and defense counsel. When Finan became a Reservist, he began working at Jim Womble's law firm -- Everett, Lawrence and Womble -- in the early 1980s.
Finan worked at the firm until he was appointed as a District Court judge in 2007 by Gov. Mike Easley.
"When I heard he had died I was absolutely devastated, and I couldn't believe it," Womble said. "I walk my dog every morning at around six in the morning, and I would see him leave to go to the YMCA around 6:15 every morning."
Womble said upon receiving the news of Finan's death, a secretary at the firm pulled out photos from a 2003 Christmas party, bringing back memories of a man whose thoughts seemed always to center on what really mattered in life.
"He was very positive and very humorous," Womble said. "He always kept things lively at the office. I never heard him talk bad about anybody. He was just one of those rare types of people."
Aside from being a beloved judge and family man, Finan was also involved in nearly every aspect of life in the community.
Not only was he an active member of the congregation of St. Paul's United Methodist Church, but he was also a prominent member of the Goldsboro Rotary Club.
"I've known of Tim Finan for 10 years since I've been in Goldsboro," Wayne County Chamber of Commerce President Kate Daniels said. "He was this larger-than-life figure, and if you got him to emcee an event, you knew it was going to be a tremendous success. Everybody I know is still in shock at the news of his passing. The first thing that everybody is doing is they pause, and then they smile and say, 'He was just a good man."
Mrs. Daniels grew to know Finan through their joint involvement with the Rotary Club.
"To say that I was tickled to see him every Tuesday (when the club meets) is an understatement," Mrs. Daniels said. "He never missed Rotary. He's been a Rotarian for many, many years. The four way test in Rotary Club is: Of the things we think, say or do, is it the truth, is it fair to all concerned, will it build good will and better friendships and will it be beneficial to all concerned? Tim Finan exhibited the absolute essence of those four things in everything he did in his personal and professional life."
Walker said he would miss Finan's smile, faithfulness and graciousness the most now that he is gone.
"He was always gracious, and always smiling," Walker said. "He was good to everyone, regardless of whether or not they were of low birth or high birth."
For the Rev. Jim Harry, pastor at St. Paul's, his memories of Finan will include what he calls, "Finanisms," special expressions Finan used to lighten the mood or to make someone feel comfortable.
Now, those moments are special memories -- and life lessons.
"I was talking about Tim just last Sunday," Harry said. "It was a sermon on the story in the Bible where Jesus talks about mustard seeds, and how the tiniest things can amount to something significant without us even realizing it."
For example, Finan's call to get others to assist with the simplest of church tasks -- ushering.
"Tim was an usher, but he never said the word usher. He would always say 'ush,' or 'ushing.' He would say, 'Come ush with me,' or things like that," Harry said.
And that was just one of those Finanisms -- one of those ways the judge impacted, in small ways, the world around him.
"So during this sermon, I was going through people in my life that had planted these mustard seeds -- tiny, seemingly insignificant things that now mean so much to me -- and Tim was one of the first people that came to mind when I was delivering that sermon, because he did so many small things that wound up meaning so much, whether it be greeting everyone he saw with a smile and a firm handshake or telling a joke that would have everyone in stitches. He was just one of those people that you felt better for having encountered."
And while Finan himself is gone now, the indelible mark he left on Wayne County and everyone he met will linger long behind him.
"I like to think that he's up there somewhere making everybody laugh, just like he did while he was with us," Mrs. Gwatney said.
Finan was evoking laughter from family and friends until just before he passed.
Senior Resident Superior Court Judge Arnold Jones recalls a text message he received from his mentor just before he died -- a quip about Jones' pending 50th birthday.
"It said, 'The sun will come out tomorrow -- even after you're 50,'" Jones said, choking up. "Well, the sun will come out over the courthouse tomorrow, but it will shine a little darker. Without Tim Finan, it'll never shine quite as bright."